I realized today that most of my posts musing on the topic of love were all leaning on the brighter romantic-ish side of February 14th. Don't think I'm trying to balance out the two sides of hater versus lover because I'm not. I have creative freedom to muse whatever I want! Muwahaha! Anyhow, back on topic--maybe it's a good idea to discuss the viewpoint of the heartbroken.
In my time, I've read handfuls of heartbroken letters that have been written out but never sent to the person to whom they were addressed. Unsent letters, a string of tearful diary entries, two dozen midnight text messages venting to your closest friends, the ceremonial shredding or trashing of pictures, and the endless repeat of Evanescence's "My Immortal" on your iPod are just some of the various ways the heartbroken cope with their emotions. No matter what brave face you put on for your friends or family, heartbreak is never easy to deal with. We always hope for a clean break should love ever fall apart, but clean is never really how life operates. No matter the reasons for love falling apart, we always feel the absent of love when it has left our doorstep. We notice the void in our hearts and in our lives when it ceases to hold our bodies in its warm embrace. We sometimes sense the love that was once present in our veins has now chilled to icy bitterness.
People are bitter for a reason, not because it's naturally coded into their DNA. Bitterness stems from pain and hurt that has gripped us hard. It's not easy to let go of that pain or heartbreak, and it's certainly not easy to throw your heart back out there to get it hurt again...but sometimes, we need for that bitterness to melt away so that we can move on.
But how do you allow someone into your life after someone else has caused so much havoc? How do you keep yourself from going into that dark place again? How do you mend your heart after it has been stepped on and all your hope for love has been bitten off?
I have no definite answer or solution. It's still a challenge I'm working through and a topic I will continue to muse about. If there is a magical solution to melt the hurt away and to open up our hearts fully again, I'd love to find it. For now, just keep moving forward.