“I speak of the masks I hide behind.” These are the words which began my literary journey about five years ago. With these words, I made a speech which took form as a poem which changed my life in ways I had never imagined.
Late in the summer of 2009, I wrote a poem titled “Speech of the Masquerade.” The poem was a bold revelation uncovering the true feelings and the true selves that people mask from the world. At the time, I was a freshman in high school. I used writing as an escape. Writing was a way I could freely express myself. Through words, I was able to communicate all which I was afraid to speak aloud. But sometimes, even writing was difficult, especially when I wrote of myself. The speaker of “Speech of the Masquerade” is conscious of the masquerade which is reality. She sees the masks that people wear in order to fit in and be accepted. And then she admits this is true of herself. The speaker is a shy, unknown writer who fears rejection above all else. When I wrote the poem, I was my speaker. As a shy, high school introvert, I struggled expressing myself in front of people. My fear of criticism was debilitating. Like the speaker of my poem, I kept my thoughts locked up in a notebook and shuddered at the thought of letting anyone read my work. Then somehow, my words gave me the courage to share my work. In the spring of 2010, I submitted this poem to Poetry Matters Contest, telling myself that I had nothing to lose. A month or so later, I received an email congratulating me for winning first place in the high school category for poetry. Before I knew what was happening, I was at the Poetry Matters awards ceremony reading my poem aloud. In that moment, I was reminded that the narrator of my poem takes a stand. My narrator has the power to command speech and is unafraid to speak and reveal her true self. In reality, I was the narrator, and I had the power to speak my mind. Reading my poem aloud to an audience meant I was vulnerable, but this openness was the start of change. Who knew that this change would lead to future publication? Lucinda Clark, the founder of Poetry Matters and the publisher of P.R.A. Publishing, spoke to me after the ceremony about my writing. This was the first time I had ever considered publishing my work. “Speech of the Masquerade” gave me my poetic voice and offered me the courage to continue writing. Throughout high school and college, I continued to write. I filled notebooks with poetry. I embarked on the national writing challenge called “National Novel Writing Month” (“NaNoWriMo”). I attended open mics, entered various poetry competitions, and submitted work to literary magazines. In the fall of my freshman year of college, I took a leap of bravery and submitted a query letter to P.R.A Publishing to publish a collection of my poetry. My poetry manuscript titled Speech of the Masquerade is about unmasking the rawness of human emotions. It is about voicing our personal stories, unveiling our beautiful souls, and unmasking ourselves so that the world can see who we are and how we feel. As I worked with P.R.A on the details going into the publication of my chapbook, I balanced college coursework and continued work on my novel manuscript. For me, I knew my “normal college experience” differed from everyone else’s. Where many of friends relaxed with video games and TV after classes finished for the day, I returned to my dorm room to novel write. Writing is still an escape for me, and poetry is still my first love. For me, "Speech of the Masquerade" is more than just a poem. "Speech of the Masquerade" is my voice.
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The editing process has been completed, the layout process begins today, and I'm starting to gather endorsements for my chapbook of poetry! After many months of work, things are truly unfolding beautifully now. For this, I must thank PRA Publishing for doing the impossible (aka. publishing my manuscript which I had imagined would always stay locked up in my notebook). I'm also eternally grateful to my editor Melody Collins who is a saint, a genius, and a wizard. She performed beautiful magic on my manuscript.
Dear world,
I say this with love: Please proofread. Just last week (aka. a few days before the Fourth of July), I passed by an establishment with this sign. I shook my head, snapped a picture of said sign, and notified the managers thusly. May this be a warning to all who forget proofread. That is all. It's hard to believe that this was me four years ago. Four years ago, I made a speech which took form as a poem which would change my life in ways I had never imagined. I wrote "Speech of the Masquerade" in late summer of 2009, but it wasn't until the spring of 2010 when I shared this poem with anyone. As I said in the video, writing for me was an escape--a place where I could freely express myself. As a shy high school introvert, I struggled expressing myself in front of people. Fear of criticism was debilitating. Like the speaker of my poem, I kept my thoughts locked up in a notebook. In the spring of 2010, I submitted this poem to Poetry Matters Contest after an English teacher mentioned the submission guidelines for the poetry contest. Honestly, I didn't expect anything, but still, I had nothing to lose. This was the first time I had submitted writing for any kind of competition. A month or so later, I received an email congratulating me for winning first place in the high school category for poetry. I danced, I shouted in joy, and exclaimed to friends about this accomplishment...but then I realized the catch. I'd have to publically recite my poem at the awards ceremony. This thought was enough to paralyze me. For as long as I could remember, I cursed public speaking. The experiences I had with it involved memorized recitations in front of classmates who either paid meticulous attention or fell asleep in the middle of your presentation. Needless to say, my experiences with presentations was rather negative. The idea of reading in front of a crowd was daunting, especially if it was in front of adults. In a way, I was afraid of how my poem would be received by those around me. About week or so before my recitation, I sought help from a former English teacher of mine who seemed to be the guru of public speaking. She coached me and reminded me of my narrator's strength. My narrator had the power to command speech. The speaker is unafraid to speak and reveal her true self. In reality, I was the narrator and I had the power to speak my mind. When I read this poem at the awards ceremony, I feel an unexplainable bout of confidence. This doesn't mean I wasn't nervous because I was terribly afraid before the ceremony began. I mean to say that as I spoke the words of poem I felt the power of what I had written. I was vulnerable, but this openness was the start of change. Who knew that this change would lead to publication of my in a poetry anthology. Now when I think about this poem, I think of how this poem has changed me. I still am nervous presenting my poetry, but I've grown more comfortable on the stage. I go to open mics, I share my poetry with strangers, and I have found my voice in writing. "Speech of the Masquerade" is more than a poem. "Speech of the Masquerade" is my voice. Finals have finished, the spring term is over, and summer has officially begun for college students.
For the last week I've been out of Furman, I've endeavored in some more writing opportunities. Not only have I been diligently working on rewriting my novel, but I've been on the writing scene in Columbia. Twice! On Wednesday, I went with some fellow poets from the Aiken area to Mind Gravy's open mic in Columbia. There, I met some fantastic poets and some excellent songwriters. I even read a new poem of mine titled "An Elegiac Reverie." My friend, Derek Berry, did a reading of his work, including a piece from his poetry book titled Skinny Dipping with Strangers. Check him out at http://derekberry.wordpress.com/. Just today, my friends and I went to the South Carolina book festival. Our wallets cried as we purchased a large quantity of books, but it was certainly worth it. We went to a panel or two, found familiar faces in the crowd of people, and enjoyed chatting with the South Carolina authors. Overall, a very successful day and a great way to begin summer. Do you feel sentimental? Do you feel the urge to pick up a pen and write from the deepest corner of your heart? Are you more aware of the flow and rhythm of your words lately?
Did you know it's National Poetry Month? Well, dear reader, it is! So celebrate by doing one or perhaps all of the following to give notice to this auspicious occasion: 1) Write a poem--This is paradoxically a simple and complex task to accomplish, but give it the old college try. What's the worst that could happen? Creating a mythical chimera rather than a free verse poem? 2) Attend an open mic--For anyone in Greenville, I highly recommend the open mics held at Coffee Underground in downtown Greenville. 3) Read some poetry--You'll find poems scattered all over this earth in British literature textbooks, on the Internet (I'd personally recommend seeking the advice of my friend Google), in a bookstore hidden away in the corner shelf, in an old journal of English writings you were forced to keep for a senior portfolio...the list can go on infinitely. 4) Watch some performance poetry videos by Andrea Gibson or Taylor Mali. 5) Give a pat on the back to poet--It's a harder job than you think. I hope you all get a chance to enjoy National Poetry Month. Big shout out to PRA Publishing and the Aiken Standard for the article in today's newspaper about National Poetry Month! http://www.aikenstandard.com/article/20140412/AIK0401/140419819/1031/AIK04/april-is-national-poetry-month Hello, world! It's certainly been a while since I last posted. So you might ask what I've been up to since last summer? Well...I didn't slay any dragons or travel to a distant land, but I did do plenty of other semi-noteworthy things. 1) Joined the Furman Symphony Orchestra and also traveled with the Furman Wind Ensemble to Jacksonville to perform a concert for a convention. 2) Learned to play the alto flute--yes, I said alto flute. 3) Became a stagehand at Furman. 4) Attended an infinite number of concerts put on during the Juilliard in Aiken residency. 5) Survived the snow-pocalypse. 6) Took my first English class here at Furman. 7) Oh, and signed a publishing contract for a book deal during my spring break. Nothing really interesting, huh? Perhaps, I should elaborate on the book deal news. About two weeks ago, I signed my publishing contract with PRA Publishing to publish a chapbook of my poetry. In late fall of 2014, A Close Proximity to the Heart will be released. I will be spending a good portion of my summer and winter breaks touring and giving loads of poetry readings. Be on the lookout for more information. Hello to all! It's seems that I've been slacking with the blog writing. For that, I apologize, and I also propose a "creative" solution to remedy this problem. For the two months, I'll be blogging about my artistic/creative endeavors. For two solid months, I want to fill every moment I can with something creative and exciting. It'll be a summer long adventure of creative writing, playing music, composing music, painting, and much more! Already, I've been busy doing artistic jobs, but starting now, I'll start writing about my latest projects. So why exactly did I want to take on this challenge? Before the summer began, I vowed I wanted to enjoy the summer to relax. In my definition of relax, I take my completely blank calendar and fill it with all the activities I want to do. Happiness for me comes with doing anything productive and not mindless. So far, I've had a summer of absolute bliss! It's absolutely splendid to get a chance to enjoy things that you normally don't have time for! Check back tomorrow for my next blog about my summer "internship" adventures! Just recently, I received word that I had won first place in the CSRA Adult Division of Poetry Matters Competition. My award winning poem is titled "Get Me Some Flowers." Check out the video of me reading my poem! Why do you write?
Do you write because you're required to? Because it's simply part of your job or because anyone coming out of elementary school is taught how to do so and it's the norm to keep it up if we want to be intelligent, literate, or successful in the world? Why do I write? I write to express myself. Like a painter blots splashes of color on a blank canvas, a writer scribbles his or her words on paper and creates a masterpiece with metaphors, chains of ornate adjectives, and an idea that holds everything in place. Emotion lies in the words we write and speak aloud. Writing serves as an escape from the world we in which we live. If anything, it serves to distract, even if it is just for a little while. With diary entries, I vent my heart without restraint and pen all that plagues my mind. With poetry, I can create beauty or pull the curtain back to reveal the monsters beneath our beds. With novels, I reflect on the world and weave a story that speaks truth. I love taking somewhat of a philosophical stand in my writing but somehow, I also take pride in leaving the answers to the big questions somewhat muddled. I enjoy reading stories which always end nicely and neatly, but those novels that can make me squirm in my chair with the unsettling reality left on the final page are the ones that inspire me to keep writing. If a writer can move you internally and emotionally, the job is done right. I write because there is always a story worth telling, a speech worth preaching, and a phrase worth a moment of reflection. I write because I think too much and if my thoughts were not scribbled on paper, you'd find brain goo pouring from my ear. As egotistical as it may sound, I write for myself because some days I just need it to revive me and keep me sane. I write for people who have no say and remain powerless and helpless when they crave for change. I write for that one person in my audience that might be moved by my spoken word performance that she'll find a tear escape and break across her stony cheek. I write because writing is a part of me and it's who I am. I'm proud to say I'm a writer. |
AuthorKendall Driscoll is an accomplished writer/ musician/ artist/ academic scholar. Archives
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